While conducting a sales and relationship training program with a client yesterday we were reviewing behaviors that foster great business relationships.  While most of the words being shared, discussed and explored were the of the usual nature — time, commitment, respect, trust, fun, professionalism, team — one was shared that simply jumped out at me — humility. 

I have trained a great deal of sales professionals, executives, customer service, managers and owners in my life and I have never thought specifically about the role humility plays in relationships.  Yet, when I think about some of the more powerful messages I convey about being client focused, client centric, and solutions oriented one of the more powerful aspects of those behaviors is the ability to be in service to the needs, issues, and challenges of your prospective and current clients.  In order to accomplish this, humility has to be part of the equation.

It is quite difficult to be a trusted and valued resource if arrogance, greed, self-centered, or egotistical behaviors are in the mix.  Having a keen sense of your obligations as it relates to your clients’ issues, challenges, and needs by delivering on your commitment to assist them for the good of their business, you cannot be celebrating your greatness while accomplishing it.  The opportunity to help others and to be trusted by others is a gift they bestow upon you and you can only appreciate their trust if you bring a humble sense of accountability for it.

In this particular client training, we were strategizing how to approach a business relationship that was starting to break down.  As this was an important relationship, the client asked how to approach them and discuss the obvious frictions that were building.  With a focus on humility and obligation and commitment to an improved relationship I suggested they approach their customer in this manner:

“Having a strong valued relationship with you is very important to us.  As we examine where we are today, it is obvious to us that we have not done a very good job of being a valued and trusted resource for you.  We would like to have a discussion to learn how we can do a better job of being that trusted and valued business resource.”  

The obvious message being conveyed is their commitment to and their ownership for an improved relationship.  That is recognizing and accepting direct accountable for the development of a better partnership.  This is humility — bringing sincerity, commitment, obligation, and personal responsibility and honor to your business relationships. 

Humility was a great vocabulary lesson for me.  I hope you will think about this in your future relationship development tactics, behaviors, and conversations, as well.